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Stay at home moms

April 13, 2012

I am riled up! In recent years stay at home moms have been made to feel like second-class citizens. Like they are not as intelligent as career moms. Well, I take issue with that. And the ignorant comment made by Ms. Rosen who said Ann Romney had never worked a day in her life. Phooey! Let Ms. Rosen raise 5 boys and then tell us what work is.

I am not making a political statement here. I was allowed to be home with my children and I was blessed. I know that there are others who have to work in these economic times. And I get that. There are others who choose to build a career and leave the rearing of their children to someone else. I don’t get that. No one can replace a mom! No one. It is difficult to balance career, home, family & marriage. More and more women who have tried have reported that it cannot be done – something has to give.

Some of you make take umbrage with me. Let me tell you  that I have worked an 8 to 5 job. That’s hard work. But  it isn’t of equal value to rearing a family.

The liberal left wants the conservative right to allow a woman to choose and respect her choice when it comes to abortion (another topic for another day!) but then they don’t respect a woman’s right to stay at home and choose to rear her children rather than delegate it to another. (Now that is a political statement.) Seems like a double standard to me.

I am so glad my mother, a very gifted and talented woman who could have had a career, stayed home with 5 little Graham’s. She modeled womanhood for me. The lessons she taught me were invaluable. She shaped my life. What is more important than shaping a little life?

I loved having children and being with them. I loved taking them to discover dinosaur footprints in Texas when we lived there. Being a Girl Scout cookie mother. Making birthday parties. Bandaging their hurts. Drying their tears. Giggling over something silly. Watching them discover the wonders of God’s world. And kneeling with them as they gave their hearts to Christ.

No, no career can match that.

 

14 Comments leave one →
  1. sharon edwards permalink
    April 13, 2012 10:32 am

    Thank you for being a public voice and being bold!

  2. Pat Sloan permalink
    April 13, 2012 11:03 am

    I have had the privilege of being a stay at home Mom and having a career. For ten years I was home with my children. I treasure those years and would have remained at home even after they were in middle and high school if my circumstances had allowed. Women don’t make a sacrifice when they stay home; they make a sacrifice when they have to go to work. I am so thankful that my Mom was home every afternoon after school. She was always there for us and still is at 86 years old.

  3. Brenda Nash permalink
    April 13, 2012 11:04 am

    I did not take offense by the Rosen comment. I took her to mean that having to work outside the home AND being a mother is the real issue. Ms. Rosen probably should have defined the word, ‘work’ more clearly. There are many women that would love to be a stay at home mother, but cannot with the status and pressures of our culture today. God bless ‘em if they must work outside the home and raise their children! What an honorable position to fill if one finds herself at home with her babies. Ms. Romney is probably in the position that every American woman would love to be in…secure relationship, financially secure, and raising wonderful children. Above all, every woman, seeking first the kingdom of God, whether a stay at home mom or a working mom, must be salt and light in every arena. Jesus never said it would be easy when we follow him. However, his yoke certainly is lighter than what the world offers!

  4. ferne permalink
    April 13, 2012 11:11 am

    FANTASTIC !!!!!!!!! thank you!

  5. Marcy Rosenstein permalink
    April 13, 2012 11:13 am

    Amen and Amen

  6. Bill Marshall permalink
    April 13, 2012 11:48 am

    My daughter elected to stay home to raise our grandchildren. I just forwarded this blog to her.

  7. Patricia permalink
    April 13, 2012 1:57 pm

    I have 2 daughters. One is able to stay at home with her children because her husband earns a good salary and she has generous in-laws. The other one has to work part-time as her husband needs to finance his brother’s education and help support their father who lives in a developing country while not earning a very high salary himself. In my view both are doing good jobs and are excellent mothers despite their very different circumstances.

  8. Diana Schipper permalink
    April 13, 2012 2:46 pm

    Extremely well said Ruth. Thank you for speaking out. Some may consider it a political statement, but I see it as an old fashioned conviction, which our world seems to be lacing in these days.

  9. Carla permalink
    April 24, 2012 8:41 am

    I spent 18 years as a working single mother. I had three full-time jobs: parenting, working 9 to 5 in an office, and keeping house. It was exhausting and overwhelming. My only social outlet was church, where everything was geared to stay-home moms. I longed to join their Bible studies and prayer groups, but they met on weekdays when I was at work. I fought for years to get Vacation Bible School moved to evenings so children of working parents could attend. They finally agreed to give it a try, but by then my daughter was too old to participate. I dare anyone to say that I didn’t shape my daughter’s life because I was a working mom. I suppose I could have applied for welfare and food stamps and stayed home, but that wasn’t the example I wanted to set. Today, I couldn’t be prouder of my young-adult daughter. She works, goes to college, lives on her own and has many friends. She is a kind, compassionate, and loving young woman. As for the stay-home moms I knew years ago, not all their children have turned out well. One has a criminal record and several have had problems with substance abuse.

    • April 24, 2012 11:38 am

      I understand. I know there are many who have to work in these economic times and would stay at home if they could. They – you – carry a heavy load. I applaud them and you. My comments had to do with those who chose careers over their family’s need.

    • Patricia permalink
      May 3, 2012 2:43 pm

      Well said Carla about the reality of life for so many working mothers in the USA and UK. How sad that your Church was not more supportive and imaginative in what it offered for the children of working parents. In my professional life I’ve met some really grim stay at home mothers whose parenting has been an absolute disaster and some caring working mothers who have managed to balance the needs of their family with earning a living. In the Developing World women work extremely hard both inside and outside of the home in order that their families have a chance of physical and economic survival. The debate is essentially one of the privileged middle class Western World and seems to have been hi-jacked by people both on the conservative right and the so-called liberal left making cheap political points .

      (Here in the UK the term “liberal left” doesn’t have quite the same negative connatations that it apparently has in the USA).

  10. Carol permalink
    April 29, 2012 8:18 am

    What Moms do day in and day out may seem meaningless to some but it is HUGE! I am praying for Moms to be encouraged and to depend on God to give them wisdom and strength in their daily interactions with ther children. As Moms we can~

    Make
    Our
    Time
    Here
    Eternally
    Rewarding

    Investing in the lives of our children is important. What a privilege Moms have to share the love of Jesus with the special ones He has put in our lives. He could have chosen ANY woman to be the mother of your children but He chose you!

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